Bound to the Devil: In His Hell

Legit jus a big mess so many problems1. Inconsistent with names he switches the names of the ice girl so much and the sword like how can’t you remeber this. He also uses the wrong name for the eyes saying sharigan a lot 2. Power system is jus dumb he can fight and kill a peak c rank but struggles against a D rank dummy keep in mind he’s like E rank during this and he fought a main character fine as a E- rank while they were D rank so like what3. He jus gets new powers all the time. He jus gets stuff and doesn’t even have like a fighting style tbh he jus does whatever like he uses a katana and its supposed to be like quick and wtv and then he gets telekinesis and starts using daggers and besides that he also jus gets a nine tailed fox out of no where and people jus are fine with it not even questioning how he got it if he’s disowned and supposedly untalented enough to be disowned.4. Next thing is no back story all we know is he is disowned fir being untalented but he improves as if he has no bad talent and as far as i know he doesn’t drink anything besides the mana potion that boosts his talent to grow that much5. Characters jus hate him for some reason and from the looks of it it’s because he got disowned and they jus interact in a boring rigid unrealistic way like ice girl can be struggling to do telekinesis and then jus fight perfectly fine with it in the next paragraph As long as you can close your eyes and mind this novel is fine but besides that it’s jus words and shit legit nothing makes sense and there’s no real story line jus random things to keep it going

Me and my small team what do you do? Want to know what you feel to think about the story so far and how the writing is please leave us reviews of any kind and telling us what can we work on?

This story has a lot of potential, hope mc aspires to gain power and eternal life

"Thank you again for saving us kid, next time you come by Dwargo just look for us. We'll be sure to accommodate you happily" said Orthorn.

Since a while ago she got very spirited, she would move and play all the time, it was even hard to find a moment where she wasn't laughing or enjoying herself one way or another. For a while now she started liking to play hide-and-seek and she was getting quite good at it if compared to when she started and would leave her feet out in the open when she hid behind the curtains.

"There was once a dog named glue then it fell off, you know what happened to it?" said Alexander.

Suddenly he felt something slide up his leg and stop between them. He gulped and stared at her. She gave him an innocent smile and excused herself, swaying her hips as she left. "Damn," he looked down at his bulging crutch.

AUTHORS NOTE