Apricity: ??? ?????? ?? ??? ??? ?? ?????? ???????? ??????: ???? ??? ????? ?????? ?? ? ???????ℎ?? ????? ???ℎ ?? ???????? ???? ?? ????ℎ??? ??? ???????? ??? ?ℎ? ???? ????? ????????? ???????. ???? ?????? ?? ? ???? ??? ??? ℎ?????? ??? ?? ????????, ?????? ?? ?ℎ? ?????? ℎ? ?????. ?ℎ?? ????? ℎ????? ?? ?ℎ??? ??? ????? ? ????? ??'?? ℎ??? ?? ???? ???. :???-?ℎ??? ?ℎ?????? ??? ????. Ranks 2nd in SunshinexGrumpy (Feb 8, 2023) 1st in SunshinexGrumpy ( April 16, 2023) 6th in sweet (April 18,2023)
Recommendation Lists
Original Group
Latest Release
-
wattpad C 29
-
wattpad C 28
-
wattpad C 27
-
wattpad C 26
-
wattpad C 25
-
wattpad C 24
-
wattpad C 23
-
wattpad C 22
-
wattpad C 21
-
wattpad C 20
-
wattpad C 19
-
wattpad C 18
-
wattpad C 17
-
wattpad C 16
-
wattpad C 15
-
wattpad C 14
-
wattpad C 13
-
wattpad C 12
-
wattpad C 11
-
wattpad C 10
-
wattpad C 9
-
wattpad C 8
-
wattpad C 7
-
wattpad C 6
-
wattpad C 5
-
wattpad C 4
-
wattpad C 3
-
wattpad C 2
-
AkshatKumar4303 rated it
I only managed to get through the first 6 chapters.... The grammar and syntax are beyond bad. The author miss-uses tenses a lot. Infact he interchangeably uses them in every other sentence. Even the average 6th grader should have a better grasp on atleast the 4 simplest and when to use them: Simple past/past progressive and simple present/present progressive. To the author: I am not trying to disparage your work but you are honestly not that gifted when it comes to grammar, either study up or get an editor to do the work for you. One last thing: even in the earlier chapter you are artificially inflating your wordcount. You are creating needlessly complicated sentences that no one understands and break syntax. Keep the sentences short, it will improve flow, you'll make less mistakes and the reader will in no way be confused.0 0 Reply
-
Biyze rated it
This is a promising novel 👏🏻👏🏻 so far so good, add some strong romance and don’t random girls to the harem which a lot novels dose which end up killing it. Thanks for chapters can’t wait for more0 0 Reply
-
KingofDezzNuts rated it
Your writing is beautiful…I look forward to your writing...I wish I could write like you...You write how I feel, even if I can’t express it...Your writing inspires me...I falling in love with your novel.I hope can read it every time, everywhere...I hope you writing this novel to the end...Good job and thank you for your hard working to finishing all chapter.........0 0 Reply
-
holypen rated it
need more chapter my friendthis masterpiece really have more imagination and fetish than i am0 0 Reply
-
Akgonzalla rated it
Lyra woke up to a gentle knocking on the door, she rubbed her eyes , turned the doorknob to a smiling Dumbledore0 0 Reply
-
ScarlettYgddrasil rated it
Tàizǐ diànxiàwas stunned. Instead of leaving his queen Yan Jing position his queen infront of the king.Tàizǐ'spawn removed the queen and the king removed the pawn and give the king a chance to skip one death.0 0 Reply
-
AztecAzazel rated it
Didn't make sense not to live for fun0 0 Reply
-
thebiggestdawgzfU rated it
And we could all use a little change0 0 Reply
Leave a Review
Part 1. Rate His Sunshine (click Star to vote)
Part 2. Login to account
Part 3. Write your review

