Full-Scale Judgment/Elegy of the Forgotten Angel (Name Pending)

Author here, This is my first novel so sorry if it’s not greatest but I want more sport system novels and because I couldn’t see them, I decided to do it myself. I appreciate any helpful comments

Why do authors love making main characters so disappointing? The guy reincarnated but acts like a child. If he had forgotten his past life and only remembered fragments, that would be understandable, but here he is—a full-grown adult acting like a kid. Chapter 21 is especially frustrating. He, his five-year-old twin sister, and another girl go through a portal. This other girl is taken by a flying creature, and here’s what the author writes:  > "Nox and Nyx remained rooted to the spot, trying to come up with a plan. Nyx stayed calm, but Nox's fingers trembled. Why wouldn’t he be restless? Coming into this dimension had been his idea, after all. If anything went wrong here, it would be his fault, and he would blame himself for the rest of his life. ‘Do you still have any tricks?’ Nyx had a bitter smile on her face, staring at her brother from the side of her eyes."Notice that the five-year-old girl, who was just born recently, is calmer than this clueless idiot. Plus, the fact that he calls his twin sister his "older sister"… A grown man calling his *twin* sister, who’s five, his "big sister"? That’s where I draw the line.

And all that glitters is gold

"Don't look at me like that. My father is going to take me hunting."

And I am still in love with him and will be forever....

The man has hooded eyes and a lazy grin seemingly etched permanently to his face. One could even think he was a drunkard if not for the lack of the signature flush on his face. Although he wasn't particularly stunning or ugly, the mysterious aura and demeanour that he ceaselessly emits makes people's gazes linger. If they notice him anyways. His sea-green hair contrasts the dark brown undershirt he wears with a pair of short pants. The clothes he wears are casual to the point that one may thought he was in his own room doing his business. He's even bare feet!

A burst of cold laughter followed by him after his merciless words.

I listened to the roar of the engine for a while as I collected my thoughts on even what I expected.