Wow, the story is captivating from the start! It feels like you are really inside his world. Kudos to the author. You nailed it! Can't wait for Luke to achieve his goals.
A popular premise, but well-executed. There’s a few flaws I wanted to point out, in the hope to help you progress.
Your grammar is passable, although I would personally refrain from using the passive voice as much as you do. It makes sentences clunky, vague and awkward. So if you can change the subject of the sentence in order to rewrite it in active voice without this changing your meaning, I advise you to do so.
There is an absence of rhythm in your writing. I’m aware it isn’t easy to write with rhythm, and personally, I struggle with it as well, but try to bring some more rhythm to your paragraphs.
The dialogue is clear, but sometimes it comes across a a bit forced.
Overall, I believe your work holds a lot of potential. I wish you luck!
Reading this book makes me remember my favorite anime, Attack on Titian. Nice one author, you developed your well, I really hope to see more and it would nice if it's better than AOT. I'm rooting for you.
I have always been a fan of Vampires. And the way you blended it with the setting of one of my favorite anime, AOT, this book, to me, is simply splendid. Keep up the good work!
The story start with dark plot and i really enjoyed how the author create the post apocalypse and how the author make the plot of this story not boring. every chapter i read i really can't hold myself
Popular Reviews
Your grammar is passable, although I would personally refrain from using the passive voice as much as you do. It makes sentences clunky, vague and awkward. So if you can change the subject of the sentence in order to rewrite it in active voice without this changing your meaning, I advise you to do so.
There is an absence of rhythm in your writing. I’m aware it isn’t easy to write with rhythm, and personally, I struggle with it as well, but try to bring some more rhythm to your paragraphs.
The dialogue is clear, but sometimes it comes across a a bit forced.
Overall, I believe your work holds a lot of potential. I wish you luck!
you did an amazing work here. this novel is not to be missed by any.
I don't know but I like Vampire novels and this one also got me .