Noice Aw someMake all of them knock up !That would be NICEHEHEHEHHEHEHEHEH HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHehe hehehehheheheheh hehe hehehehheheheheh hehe hehehehheheheheh hehe hehehehheheheheh hehe hehehehheheheheh
Translation is like its generated by machinenovelAnd story is just dumbHe is literally playing a gameHe is another world but his previous world knowledge is the best......WTFAnd that scene when he was in the cave with the girl ..it was like she was waiting for him to sleep with her... like he just touched her once and she pulled her clothes open for him to do her....WTFthis novel is just waste of time!!
This is a review of chapter 1 since that is all that is currently out. I didn't know what to expect going into this. But in the end, I came out satisfied. From an enjoyment point of view, I think this story has a lot of potential right off the bat. I am curious to see how the two will grow their relationship. And I NEED to know more about what lies in the astral state. Those entities are set up to be great threats so you better bring out their full horror!From a grammatical point of view. I think it's nearly perfect as is. The only thing I could be picky about is some small grammar points like punctuation and spelling. Some words could've also been used better but it still is fully comprehensible. I think proofreading once or twice will make this the best up-and-coming story!
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