REVIEW
Narration: Decent and immersive
Worldbuilding: Vast and detailed
Character development: Nice and steady
Character design: Outstanding
Dialogues: Realistic and Lifelike
Pacing: Not fast nor too slow
Writing quality: Magnificent
Execution of the Genre: Good pitch
Story potential: High
Updating Stability: Steady
MESSAGE
I am deeply happy that the author joined spirity. As it has the potential to win! With more exposure, this will become great and even reach a million views! Or anime adaptation even a movie! Kudos on your work and See you in December (if you know what I mean)
Only a few chapters in and here is my review. Professional story! That's all that comes to mind when I read this book. It's very detailed and has a nice plot. The author seems to have a set direction for the story, which gives the writing a sense of purpose (something not seen often on these webnovel books). I noticed a few mysteries already popping up that are itching for an answer.
No big cons with this book. It's another great system read that could find a solid fan base on webnovel. I see a bright future for this book and the author. (4.8 whish it could be adjusted a bit higher)
On a side-note : Idk how you will do it, but a story needs something that stands out in the beginning. Whether its a unique MC(blind, deaf, ect.), setting (growing up in a dumpster), or a mystery. You have some of these, but the truly great stories put their own twist. Just my little opinion, nothing more :)
There's so much to cover but I can't spoil it, unfortunately! At first, I thought this was another eastern novel but I was quickly surprised with how fast the story shifted.
Writing Quality: Despite the writer's first language not being English, most of the scenes are described quite well. Excellent story-telling and the dialogues are quite realistic. Remember, however, that not everything in a scene needs to be revealed to the reader, like specific locations, numbers, etc. leave a bit of imagery to the reader :)
Stability of Updates: Too soon to tell but they seem to be on the right track. Just keep writing every day and try to make deadlines for yourself. My goal is 3 Chapters every day before the afternoon, practice makes perfect.
Story Development: If I could go 7/5 I would! As soon as they talked about the borrowing system a few chapters in all I could think about was FMA and FMA: B regarding 'Equivalent Exchange.' I thought that was one of the most interesting concepts to ever exist in anime because the MCs aren't typically overpowered as they have to be creative with what they already have.
You can already tell that the MC is crafty and resourceful, so it'll be interesting to see how he uses this new system and for what.
Character Design: Excellent work describing each of the characters and making them memorable, from the names to the way they act. Bravo!
World Background: I could easily visualize each place they were in, imagery is imperative in fiction and it seems like you know what you're doing -- you're already a ways ahead of your competition.
In conclusion, love the book so far, love the idea, and can't wait to read more!
P.S. With English being my second language I can totally relate to you as I can see the minor mistakes you're making in your work (imagery, diction, and sentence-structure wise) if you'd like to talk we can exchange discords :)
So I came here for a review swap and wasn't sure what to expect going into this book. I recently got out of my Books with Systems phase and was quite tired of all the systems that were A) cute, fluffy but utterly useless and B) cold, mechanical, calculative and just using the mc for its gain (and the mc that is given no choice but to obey albeit unwilling). Imagine how elated I was when here comes a system that HELPS the mc. Even if Genesis doesn't give out impromptu missions like a game (I like this), just the originality of the borrowing system sold the story to me.
Plot wise, I have nothing to say. 5 stars. The author was more focused on character development than world building in the first few chapters but luckily it didn't drag on for too long. Mysteries and more Genesis scenes prompted me to not skip-read, and I'm glad I didn't.
The MC is smart, hilarious and the way his system functions is definitely the most unique one I have ever read. The only problem is sometimes the past and present tenses get mixed up and I get confused.
All in all, this is an intriguing and interesting story. If the grammar errors can be corrected, I will rate it perfect stars. Best of luck author!
In most original system novels, you see authors ripping the concept off right from some Chinese original novel.
But not this one. As far as I have read, it is original. Even if it isn't, the author handles the situation and system very professionally.
Though I am afraid the novel might turn into another of those system protag where the mc is actually the sidekick.
But I digress, good novel
this novel is probably one of the most original thought i have ever come upon with regards to themes on systems.. unique and wonderdully written you will never be bored with the way the author narrates the story of wang wei. kudos to you dear author and keep writing!
Don't know much about novels with systems, but I can tell that this is an innovation. The title of the book is both hooking and intriguing. Never seen something similar to it before. The plot seems to have a lot going on too
Popular Reviews
Narration: Decent and immersive
Worldbuilding: Vast and detailed
Character development: Nice and steady
Character design: Outstanding
Dialogues: Realistic and Lifelike
Pacing: Not fast nor too slow
Writing quality: Magnificent
Execution of the Genre: Good pitch
Story potential: High
Updating Stability: Steady
MESSAGE
I am deeply happy that the author joined spirity. As it has the potential to win! With more exposure, this will become great and even reach a million views! Or anime adaptation even a movie! Kudos on your work and See you in December (if you know what I mean)
No big cons with this book. It's another great system read that could find a solid fan base on webnovel. I see a bright future for this book and the author. (4.8 whish it could be adjusted a bit higher)
On a side-note : Idk how you will do it, but a story needs something that stands out in the beginning. Whether its a unique MC(blind, deaf, ect.), setting (growing up in a dumpster), or a mystery. You have some of these, but the truly great stories put their own twist. Just my little opinion, nothing more :)
Psst!!!! Here's a spoiler. The MC will borrow items from this system. Don't miss this!!!!!!!
Writing Quality: Despite the writer's first language not being English, most of the scenes are described quite well. Excellent story-telling and the dialogues are quite realistic. Remember, however, that not everything in a scene needs to be revealed to the reader, like specific locations, numbers, etc. leave a bit of imagery to the reader :)
Stability of Updates: Too soon to tell but they seem to be on the right track. Just keep writing every day and try to make deadlines for yourself. My goal is 3 Chapters every day before the afternoon, practice makes perfect.
Story Development: If I could go 7/5 I would! As soon as they talked about the borrowing system a few chapters in all I could think about was FMA and FMA: B regarding 'Equivalent Exchange.' I thought that was one of the most interesting concepts to ever exist in anime because the MCs aren't typically overpowered as they have to be creative with what they already have.
You can already tell that the MC is crafty and resourceful, so it'll be interesting to see how he uses this new system and for what.
Character Design: Excellent work describing each of the characters and making them memorable, from the names to the way they act. Bravo!
World Background: I could easily visualize each place they were in, imagery is imperative in fiction and it seems like you know what you're doing -- you're already a ways ahead of your competition.
In conclusion, love the book so far, love the idea, and can't wait to read more!
P.S. With English being my second language I can totally relate to you as I can see the minor mistakes you're making in your work (imagery, diction, and sentence-structure wise) if you'd like to talk we can exchange discords :)
Plot wise, I have nothing to say. 5 stars. The author was more focused on character development than world building in the first few chapters but luckily it didn't drag on for too long. Mysteries and more Genesis scenes prompted me to not skip-read, and I'm glad I didn't.
The MC is smart, hilarious and the way his system functions is definitely the most unique one I have ever read. The only problem is sometimes the past and present tenses get mixed up and I get confused.
All in all, this is an intriguing and interesting story. If the grammar errors can be corrected, I will rate it perfect stars. Best of luck author!
But not this one. As far as I have read, it is original. Even if it isn't, the author handles the situation and system very professionally.
Though I am afraid the novel might turn into another of those system protag where the mc is actually the sidekick.
But I digress, good novel