NEED MORE CHAPTERS!!!!NEED MORE CHAPTERS!!!!NEED MORE CHAPTERS!!!!NEED MORE CHAPTERS!!!!NEED MORE CHAPTERS!!!!NEED MORE CHAPTERS!!!!!NEED MORE CHAPTERS!!!!NEED MORE CHAPTERS!!!!NEED MORE CHAPTERS!!!!NEED MORE CHAPTERS!!!!NEED MORE CHAPTERS!!!!NEED MORE CHAPTERS!!!!!
This is really great! Hoping to read more from you!.....................................................................................................................................
This is a review from Chapter 1 to chapter 16 and so the things I discussed in my review might have been fixed already, writing Quality-2- The sentences could be better. It seems you fond of using 'to' in explaining the motives of actions. Consider trusting your readers. An example can be found in chapter 2. 'Once they had stepped inside, he reached for the button to send them to the ground floor.'This can be changed to'Once they had stepped inside, he reached for the ground floor button.'Another example can also be found in chapter 2.'the elevator chimed again to let them know that they had reached their destination.'This can be changed to'the elevator chimed and the door opened. They had arrived'Using 'to' is a little jarring. Aside from that, sentences can be shorter too. Take this example from chapter 12.'His own path to the office was made simpler by the private elevator that took him straight from the parking garage to the thirty-second floor where his office was.'The sentence is too long. The longer the sentences get, the weaker they are. Shorter sentences are easier to understand. Also better words could have been used in expressing the idea. 'A private elevator eased his access from the garage to his office in the thirty-second floor.'or'A private elevator simplified his access from the garage to his office in the thirty-second floor.'The thing is, readers don't actually want to read. They say they do but that is a misconception. Nobody wants to read. Reading is a tedious process. What the readers want is the information from. So if writers can express a story in a thousand words rather than two thousand, then that would ease the burden of reading. The job of writers is to lull the readers into believing a tale they crafted with the shortest word count possible. Stability of updates- 5- I don't really care much about stability of updates. Automatic 5.Story Development - 3- The story is about falling from heights and rising again with the help of several characters. As of chapter 16, the story is still kicking off which is partly because of the short chapters (which is not a bad thing). It feels like a slice of life novel despite being presented with an interesting conflict. Nothing much is happening. But I can see that the story needs to trek the path of being docile for now. Chance is still adjusting after all. I suggest bringing a few side conflicts to spice this slow beginning. Personality conflicts, backstories, things like that. But honestly, I can't really say much. I've already put the story in my library. I will resume reading soon and hopefully I can make another review after catching up with the latest chapters. Character Design-3- Chance is a broken man. What happened to him was tough. His journey from being broken into rising up again is a little fast in my opinion. Other than that I don't really have problems. World Background- 5- I don't get why Webnovel has this aspect in reviews. World background? What does that mean? If it means magic systems and the worlds in isekais, then what about novels which are not fantasies? They could have replaced this with dialogue or something.Additional notes- I have no qualms about the changing of perspectives. It happened a few times that I thought the perspective is in third person omniscient. But seeing the potential of the mystery surrounding Fait's character and the other mysteries too, I think omniscient point of view is a poor choice. Final score- I added 1 full star as consideration. Webnovels are not published novels after all. 4.6
This story if ever dropped I will harass you(author) until there is another chapter. That is how good this book is, from the battles to the author's sense of humor just makes this book better. that is all
This is a really good story with a really good mc because the mc is not to op like she is can still be overwhelmed, jealous, and make mistakes which makes her character development much better. I really like this!!
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