"Are you sure?" Ask the receptionist as she was surprised at Lawrence said cause normally even if your strong for the beginner level you won't challenge something that will make your winning percentage to lower
Finally this great friend published his second novel, I read the outline of this man's story and I really recommend it, the story will be quite good, I am a friend of this writing and he gave me access to advance chapters and it is quite good 100% recommendable.
Unexpected gem, truly...I read some similar novels with this concept but this one come on top 3.The pros:-good plot, twists and pacing.Likeable characters (of course not all of them but most of them are)The dialogue (actual dialogue not the monologue cuz those were cringe as hell).World building and discriptions all were good and gave clear picture of what was happening around.Cons:-ah that was the drama, too much of it felt useless and out of place to fit what a real mafia is and how they talk and act.(The amount of whispered in the darkness, the world won't know what hit it, war is about to broje and the likes). - i don't know if i'm right but i sniffed AI there. Not heavy but the writing style was screaming at me. It was robotic sometimes and surely held that ai tone.Anyway (in tony voice)Spoilers: here, here i will rant the **** out of my negativit that i got from some chapters.After his brother and hans death it all spiraled out of control and got downright ridicilous (For me).It just turned dark, tastless and i don't really enjoy how he turned ruthless killing innocent people (ah nobody come saying they killed his brother first and whatnot...it's his fault for being lousy in protecting him)And While true it also stood for that young girl. She did nothing wrong, she isn't the one who killed his brother and wasn't even involved. she too had a familly, parents waiting for her back home maybe brother too yet got a bullet to the head after being mentally tortured by him just to prove a point to someone else.I just don't enjoy this needless villain act. and now it all it become.A broken guy just killing his way out there be it bad or good guy he simply didn't care. He lost control.His mother breaking him is one thing the other? The situation is just dumb.Imagine someone as a mafia head for years(even he himself knows he is and how the world perceive him, it doesn't matter how he didn't want to believe it).And that guy decided one day that he will go strolling unprotected, this is one.Second is letting his brother out with one man, totally knowing that tons of people out there want to get back at him(a grenade can do the job if someone was brave to get revenge but no, he let his brother out with one man in one car).... yeah sure author this is how any man(kingpin actually) think and act.And lastly? I don't see how he holds power over the government which held the army and all law enforcers.Sure he got blackmailing materials but c'mon...daring to move against president?. Like it's just normal act. So the army, fbi, agents, country forces...all afraid of some guy? Wow. He at best got 200 men around him at all times(which should have him and his brother protected if that was true). A mere one air unit force can make him disappear from the earth face but no. Your mc is some death angel that people fear or whatever cringe was that.This and the amount of people who put a gun against his brain but hesitated and pulled away because some unknown fear due to his eyes. i found it unlogical, it simply me against you, you being dead means me alive, once the head is down the body crumbles(the famillia) i'm threaten so i pull the trigger, that simple. But no they all feared his eyes (is he Supernatural or something ?)Man that was unrealistic. But i did enjoy the chapters especially the first 10...they were light, funny and engaging.Hope your next work is as great (and hopefylly not so dark lol)** hope no one actually respond with that sentance**
I love how the story starts. 😊 It is well-written and the words are carefully chosen. This kind of story is similar to some movies like for an example, you need to watch the movie again to be able to understand it. 😁 In short, this story is deep but well detailed and I love it. ❤️ Characters are well-written too. Good job on this, author!
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