I like the story, because the MC is more realistic than normal xianwu MCs. Although the system is very similar to Ultimate Scheming System, there are differences.
Wow! I haven't gotten so far into the book yet but i think it deserves a great review already. It's attention grabbing right from the start. The excitement is unceasing and quite frankly i can't wait to finish this review n get back to reading it. I definitely recommend it to all! Great writing!
"Now comes the part where I relieve you, the little people of the burden of your failed and useless lives. But as my plastic surgeon always said, If you want to go, go with a smile" -- The Joker.
You use too much Onomatopoeia. In one chapter, 3 to 5 are enough. That's the maximum amount. If there are too many, the reader's reading flow will be disrupted.Also, don't combine Onomatopoeia words in a sentence. That's not good writing. Let one Onomatopoeia word itself be on a separate line.Out of 5 chapters, chapter 4 was really uncomfortable to read. The structure is probably something I rarely or never see in other webnovels I've read. I suggest reading other similar webnovels to be able to imitate the writing style and structure.
"...But... how did it even get here?..." Just as the heat was cooling down, what the young woman said, shattered their relief. Just how did a street bum end up in a place like this? The four thought closely, with the one other, chuckling inside.
The boy managed to escape because he managed to see through the chakra, but his freedom did not last long since he was found by some Anbu ninjas from some village and they took him for having eyes of a Hyuga and the same situation was repeated but only that this time he was more cautious in not showing that he could learn skills in an instant and was used as a test subject for jutsus in other years.
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