His hands moved to unbuckle himself, and she watched his fingers dance hypnotically before her eyes before his cock was released. Her eyes widened as she took it in, gazing at the head and down the shaft. Hesitantly she pulled away, her face flushing red as she contemplated what he was about to do to her next, but his hand caught her behind her neck and held her in place. She had never seen a man's erection before, so proudly displayed and so near for her to look upon, and her lips trembled at the sight.
But they did not expect that just by breaking the enchantments they were now young again and immortal, and now they could rule the Kingdom of Glory together for a better world.
Overall it's pretty good! It can drag in some parts and feels like info is being dumped on us at the beginning, but it's got a lot of potential. Also, be careful that you don't switch tenses mid-sentence (past to present). You don't do it often, but it sticks out when you do.
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