Development game

Was looking forward to the System vs MC dynamic but that basically disappears by chapter 100. It only shows up randomly to annoy the MC. Progress basically turns into generic cultivation but is lock stepped by the system. Power progressions feels completely forced and only serves to let MC fight stronger enemies. This is especially true when his friends also start progressing like xianxia MCs. Humor is mostly low brow and 90% of the jokes don't work, and serves to make the MC look retarded. The author also makes the MC retarded for that matter. I guess it feeds back into the low brow humor and gives it a reason to exist.Story isn't cohesive. Feels like most chapters are just filler of go here, get item/inheritance, but item/inheritance doesn't really matter because system will randomly give a new overpowered skill. Character and world development is underwhelming. I can't even form an idea of what clothes the characters are wearing beyond generic ancient Chinese clothing. Tl:dr Original premise is basically given up for filler chapters of meaningless events of low brow humor. Arbitrary power progression introduces new enemies and events to recycle filler. Character development, world building, etc takes a backseat to the above.

Though I have a few bits to criticize, it's good so far.The first, and most important, is that all the dialogue sounds like the same person. It helps a lot with fleshing out a character to give them a unique voice. It doesn't have to be as large a change as Yoda or as obvious as the "desu" some authors plant at the end of a sentence, but it really helps if something changes based on who's talking. It also helps break the feeling that you're reading someone tell you a story instead of reading a story.Another thing to remember is that events in reality have a pace to them. It can be easy to write paragraphs about the thought process in the moment, and maybe that's how it actually happened in their head, but readers either lack the speed of thought or the IRL influence forcing their attention so it draws ******* out of a situation. If the situation is easy or doesn't require their attention, that makes sense, but if it's a desperate or intense situation it can disconnect the reader from the story. Basically, try to keep the intensity of the reader's experience the same as what's going through the MC's head.

Asking for stones for this is an insult to all authors.You should try to write the plot on a piece of paper then see if what you write next actually fits with what is already there

I kinda like it... I love the idea behind it... and I really want to read it... but it just does not strike a cord with me. I have read 23ch... and I had to force myself to read it for the last 10 ish chapters. I just don't like that the colonists are experiencing hardships at every corner... nothing feels like it's going right for them. Even though it probably will work out in the end. It doesnt feel like progress is being made and that makes the story feel very slow paced and thus boring. Everything else about the story is fine, the grammar, the style of writing is ok, the world building really feels like it will lead to something great with all the little tidbits that are beeing dropped. It is just that the story does not grab my attention and nothing so far has been something that would make me feel excited/happy for the MC or his colonists... everything that happened so far just made me feel worried and anxious or just straight up disinterested. For every step that is made it feels like they make 2 steps back and that some new problem arises.Well I have rated it highly because I do think that it is a novel with an interesting premise... and that it will probably lead up to something very interesting later when the colony grows and when, I'm guessing, we get a more of a kingdom building aspect which I always find enjoyable. Tho I don't want to torture myself reading something I don't find interesting just to get to something interesting after 200 chapters. Good Luck with the story!

Read up to around 600 or 800 (near the end) partthe begin is great, classic system video game, little bit of kingdom building and industrialization. Game elements are quite consistant throughout. Around chapter 500 or 700 the novel shifts away from the supporting characters and turns more into the whole save the world, wuxia style novel. Stopped reading there, overall an above average webnovel and was quite good however not at the level of a hidden gem like the world of deities (my gods that webnovel gets good at chap. 235).

I struggled with this one... didn't quite enjoy it and well for me at least it's pretty boring. Usually for me what makes a great novel stand out is characters first, comedy and action second and great plot third and well here I got tired of the mc real quick, there's no real action or great comedy and for the plot? Well I haven't gotten that far yet before dropping it. You may like it so feel free to try it but I really don't.

It's really cool. I'm actually excited to see more bloodlines and evolutions. Please no harem or at least make it so they have sense. Each individual is unique and while it's not impossible, it's very hard to imagine people being comfortable with sharing.

Great so far - keep it up! Loved the plot and character build! Can’t wait to see what happens in the next chapters!! Thank you for sharing!!!