- #1
Literally the first 5 chapters the MC does something so efffing out of the blue that it hurts my brain. I like to see some cohesion in my story not what ever this is: the MC supposedly a child (10 ish) not even a teenager goes to a neutral gang and riles them by saying that he knows their secret because he regressed, and that too with only one body guard in a den of this gang. Apparently even the body guard and the MC find his own action weird... sheesh. At least make him 14 or 15 year old and say this is happening in chapter 20 after a bit more world building. not throw at us a useless filler.