- #1
Story setup without much spoilers:Spoiler
The story takes place in a world where multiple non/demi-human races suffer due to a human-supremacist empire. Our hero is somehow transferred to said world and found unconscious by humans. However, as he has a divine mark making him some sort of evil god's favourite, he is thrown in jail with a captured "Zoan" (super-strong beastwoman). They end up befriending each-other and getting saved by other Zoans... After some time he becomes a sort of war-leader and teaches them high-end concepts such as: running on open terrain toward fortifications is bad, esp. when you have no distance weapons and you opponent does.
[collapse]The MC concept is interesting: MC is your average Joe, with no extended knowledge about making black powder, supernatural intelligence or any other OP power. His main ability is being and history nerd, allowing him to use historic events as references to craft battle plans.However, this is served by very poor writing.- The Zoans are s*upid brutes and it's a wonder they didn't go extinct before the start of the story.
- Characters are empty, only being defined by one or two traits and no depth at all.
- The story feels as if it was "imagined while it is written". At some points, the MC gets in situations that he can't overcome without using a deus ex machina that the story must then proceed to explain. For example, at some point, a battle occurs, and the MC suddenly uses troops of a race that he is never mentioned to have met before. Ensues a flashback to explain how, actually, they were there all along.
- Sometimes, things are told from a "distant future" point of view. Think the journalists of "the Saga of Tanya the Evil" kind. The aim seem to have the reader stay interested in the story, wondering how the story went from what he (or she) knows to the legends described in "distant future PoV". However, the story feels way too much imagined while it is written for such a narrative construct to work. Instead, it just breaks immersion and spoils the events, lowering the tension instead of increasing it.
