- #1
This novel made me have to look for something to restore my faith to humanity.More of a rant than a review:Every single one of these characters thinks "I can't blame others with their choices and I understand because he is disabled and everyone wants whats better." Like bruh. F*ck everyone man. Even the FL thought so at one point. Whats being disabled got to do with him being a live human. He isn't any less human than anyone just because he is disabled.Also, aside from being gentle to Pei Chuan, FL didn't even actually try to change other's view of him. That's why no matter how gentle she is, with that kind of environment, anyone would have weak faith (I'm not specifically talking about religious faith but just faith in general. Towards human, towards anything.) Then she wonders why he still turned out like that. All it could've taken were a few words to defend him. Her best friends talk badly about him cause of the rumors but she does nothing about it. She also knows her parents were a bit discriminating towards him but she still doesn't say anything. All it could've taken were a few words of clarification even to just a few people around them, it won't make a big change but it definitely would make people aware and have an idea about it and they would be more careful.Age doesn't have anything to do with it. She knew some events from the future, she knew how he would turn out, and she knew he loved her for a long time in the future and he saved her. She knew all the cause and effects of why he turned out like that. She could've done so much for Pei Chuan with the knowledge she had of the future. I'm not hoping for her to completely change everything, but like just be with Pei Chuan. Like when his parents divorced and she knew he would hit a new low. But she chose to ignore her little notebook because she didn't want to be tied down to it. But she still sticks to Pei Chuan in the end so why didn't she take advantage of the little notebook for Pei Chuan. As someone who experienced picking myself up after breaking down and shutting myself out, time and time again, it's always more painful than the last time you tumble down, and it's always harder to get back up on your feet. Thats why I'm so mad for Pei Chuan. He tried many times and every time, he gets shut down.I'm mad at everyone but I'm only grinding the FL because she's Pei Chuan's light and she knows that Pei Chuan has and still has warmth in him, I'm not hoping for her to be an OP Mary Sue character but she should defend him to at least her closest people.I had a lot to rant about the FL cos I understand Pei Chuan's depression, insecurity, inferiority, and anxiety. I would love to read this until Pei Chuan's happiness but its too emotionally consuming for me.