- #1
The mood of the story is emotionally inconsistent. We don't know if we're supposed to be in awe, bitter, jealous... or dreading the protagonist.The story beat doesn't promise a tone other than more of that dissonant atmosphere.Its to my mind, a very experimental sort of style, but the rest is pretty typical. I don't particularly care to read more.If you experience psychotic blood lust, and desire to oppress people the mood might be inline with your personal tastes. Sort of an arrogant supreme idea... but its still not a consistent tone. To me, its not even like "scary" inconsistent where kind people become mu*derers... it feels too honest about the protagonists brutality to pull off that eerie mood. Our protagonist isn't someone I feel much sympathy for, in the broader strokes.Becoming an all powerful psychopath and then leaving for earth? I don't feel like this moron would be able to pull that off, without someone else giving him the option of coming back.A one way trip? This greedy jerk wad, would obviously sign off on coming back via some sort of signal especially if he's this greedy that he can't even handle being mocked without brutally mu*dering someone.It doesn't feel consistent.His greed for status, but his lacking efforts in seeking it... He's a bothersome villian to root for, because I don't even think he knows what he wants, or what the author wants for him. There's no consistent promise of redeeming him, if anything his brother becomes openly more brutal as we progress, and his brother is his big ideal for coming home.Without any sort of consistent promise of a pay off I can't recommend the story.33 chapters is enough time to establish what our protag wants. We know what his brother wants before we know about our primary viewpoint character's desires?If its fixing his brother's hand, he got it... so now what?
