Charlie’s Book Chapter 222 Discussion

I wanted this to be a good story. I hoped this would be a good story. It had all the potential for a good story.

An interesting premise - why on earth does the MC have a rabbit's head? A mission - save the ML's sister. Comedic sidekicks -check. Evil villains and conspiracies - check. An actual interesting set up for the last big battle - check. Unfortunate lack of chemistry between the leads - bummer.

Then it all went to pieces.

I mean there were hints earlier. Spoiler

The author just kinda killed the sister's madman husband off scene and we never see him and his equally corrupt brother again. They just get a few mentions in conversations when they were the main part of the second arc.

And though we're told Charlie ended up hiding at the cult leader's place in Paradise Island - how he gets from there to his brother Louis' place in the inner city, or how they start working together is never made clear.

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But there's such a great set up for the third act. Great tension for rescuing the astrologer. Stir up the masses against oppression, nice big grand scene. The author was doing the tension really well.

Then a huge WTF left turn on the plot. Literally Spoiler

throwing Charlie through a door into the past to play with the ML as a kid with elves in the forest. $%^$#$#!&Amp;%!!!! The author admits that the whole idea of the book came from Alice in Wonderland's scene where the Rabbit jumps down the hole and Alice falls after him. Well author, that's all fine and dandy, but DO IT IN THE FIRST THIRD OF THE STORY NOT WHEN 80% OF THE BOOK IS DONE AND YOU'VE LITERALLY JUST KILLED OFF THE VILLAIN AND EVERYONE IS STANDING THERE WAITING FOR THEIR CONCLUSION. The author just lets the whole story stop at the climax to take Charlie off to play with the fairies and when he comes back, it's five years later?!?! And we never see what happened in White Bridge! We never find out what happens to all those characters the author got us invested in! All that beautiful build up to the main fight just poofed! Come on author! What kind of **** is that?!?!?!

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*cough* Anyway. I wouldn't have been nearly so disappointed if the writing of the individual scenes hadn't been quite so intriguing that it kept pulling me along almost all the way to the end until that big plot mess.

My suggestion. Keep an eye on the author. Maybe their next story will improve plot wise and be worth reading cause they have promise.