First of all, I like the title! It kinda reminds me of the book "I am number four". It also has a unique story line that the author described in the beginning of the chapter. That goes to show how dedicated he is (the author) to let, readers, know the world! Great job
(plus *coughs* the scratching of his balls WKKWKW) Overall I like how you explained the story and what they see. The only thing that I want to point out are the confusing words and sentences in the story. It didnt distrupted my journey, but it would be really nice if you could improve those few lines better!
The constant mix of present tense and past tense is reallly realllllly annoying. And after reading like 4 chaps, I still don't know if you intended to write things in present tense or past tense.
Other than that, there's not much to badmouth regarding grammar.
As for WOrld and character design, they're very very interesting. Everything's explained in a quick, no-nonsense manner, and you can see the characters' personalities oozing out from the pages.
Some passages read in a bit of an exaggerated manner to emphasize plot points and character traits, but it's nothing too overbearing.
As for story dev, I rly can't say much at this point in the novel
I haven't read it yet, but i know its great. Why ? Cuz i can feel it.
I saw this novel last week and the first thing i noticed since then is the release rate, and its pretty cool. I'm gonna wait some more chapter to read, but i know i'll enjoy it. Keep the high release rate and i'm sure u'll reach something. Thanks. :D
Your writing can improve. But The writing flow made me easy to read and understand about the characters and everything. I can imagine them as I read it. Your writing is neat and clear.
Keep it up!
Great cover! it instantly hooked me for the story. And so far writing quality is very good!
as for what should be improved. the synopsis... its a mess. I'm my opinion you should properly arrange it.
Also after reading some chapters I noticed some of your sentences were too long. don't be afraid to go on to the next line. Also am very doubtful about your chapter names(perhaps make them a bit shorter?)
I love your writing style, It gives more life and emphasizes the story line even more. The Author thought of a very captivating concept that will definitely leave the readers hooked and wanting for more. Keep up the good work, Author! Kudos!
wonderful story. it just pulls you in. each chapter makes the story better and better. you just get drawn into the story as you keep reading. i think spelling errors and grammatical errors can be ignored since they are found in almost every book.
anyway. this sooks to be a promising book.
Popular Reviews
(plus *coughs* the scratching of his balls WKKWKW) Overall I like how you explained the story and what they see. The only thing that I want to point out are the confusing words and sentences in the story. It didnt distrupted my journey, but it would be really nice if you could improve those few lines better!
Other than that, there's not much to badmouth regarding grammar.
As for WOrld and character design, they're very very interesting. Everything's explained in a quick, no-nonsense manner, and you can see the characters' personalities oozing out from the pages.
Some passages read in a bit of an exaggerated manner to emphasize plot points and character traits, but it's nothing too overbearing.
As for story dev, I rly can't say much at this point in the novel
I saw this novel last week and the first thing i noticed since then is the release rate, and its pretty cool. I'm gonna wait some more chapter to read, but i know i'll enjoy it. Keep the high release rate and i'm sure u'll reach something. Thanks. :D
Keep it up!
as for what should be improved. the synopsis... its a mess. I'm my opinion you should properly arrange it.
Also after reading some chapters I noticed some of your sentences were too long. don't be afraid to go on to the next line. Also am very doubtful about your chapter names(perhaps make them a bit shorter?)
This isn't typically the genre i'd pick, but you convinced me to keep reading - because the story was so freaking interesting!
Will definitely come back!
good job <3
anyway. this sooks to be a promising book.