The book is pretty solid as of chap 400 the only issue I have is the author getting mixed up with past and present tense. It’s especially bad at the beginning where majority of the tenses are wrong. But apart from that, the plot and world building is quite enjoyable.
between chapters 1-100 is the best section of the storybetween 101-200 is sort of okay but the system almost doesn't exist(not exactly the strongest system)between 201-300 the MC makes decisions that make reading further impossible. At least for me, and it really let me take a step back and analyze details I had been ignoring. Which really killed everything that was interesting about this story all at once.
I never really understood this whole thing about parents spoiling their daughters books. Is it some fetish? A paraphilia? Like if you're of legal age and don't have a criminal record. You can adopt a daughter and literally pamper her with attention and affection. Seriously, there must be thousands of orphans and they don't even want a rich and super powerful father, they are satisfied with a healthy human and ethically responsible relationship. You don't have to believe me wherever you live must have social workers taking care of it. Just don't mention that the idea came from the internet.
k... the novel is fine but there are a lot of things to improve on it, starting with.1. Its been a while now since a lot of people point out that you wrote 28 years old in chapter 1 when it should be 18 and it still hasnt been fixed despite you thanking a reader for pointing it out and its been months!!!!.2.world announcements as sometimes it shows the level of the monster, others, it dosnt. Its important for the level to be known as its a difference killing a lvl 10 boss while being same level than killing it while being lvl 30 for example.3.At the start, it was said that the time was twice as long in the game but then it was said that it was only 12 hours longer and then it got increased that 1 real-world day is 2 days inside which is what was said from the start.....3. the stats of Amanda in the game are way to high for someone level 7, her stats are 119 in total - 30 stats per level - 60 stats supposing she got all 10 like shadow = 29... Meaning her equipment adds 29 points to her stats in total, thats way to much...... either its that way, she got more than 10 in stats at the start or you messed that up.4. It bothers me a lot the start of the novel with Shadow and Amanda having to run for accidentally instantly killing the senator's son by making him trip on a rock... even if that was enough to damage his head it won't be enough to instantly kill the guy unless he was to fall on his head from a few meters and im sure that he could have reached the hospital alive even if he were to die from bleeding inside the head.4. it wasnt stated how the gang found out that mc "killed" the rich guy son.5. how come Amanda was working full time as the boss of a restaurant if she was THAT good in the game and she could earn thousands dollars... dosnt makes sense and she is even higher level than MC and he is OP6. Amanda's friend Jeny seems to be from a powerful family, how come she couldn't help Amanda from the rich guy? From what i can see, Jeny could have helped Amanda with no problems 7. how is it possible for a normal guy and girl to escape a hunt from a criminal gang plus the justice for killing a person, not to mention the senator's son!!!, the pair would captured fast and easy as they had a criminal organization and the government searching for them.... and even him becoming a high paid assassin while doing so lol... where did he even get the money for that!!9. The mc calls little girl the sister of his friend but she is 18 years old, same age as the mc.... LOL10. why he didnt buy a helmet for Tina? the sister of his best friend?11. The mc wants money but as soon as he gets a new equipment he tosses the one he had out! lol, he can sell those!12. Not much is known about the classes, not even the assasin class as what they can or cant do... Such as use 1 or 2 daggers13. No world announcement was given when the mc CREATED a skill... you would think that such an amazing thing would create a world annoucement but nothing happened...All things considered, this leads me to believe that you dont have any guide while writing this nor you are keeping track of things. Its likely that you must go back to read what you wrote on X chapter to remember instead of writing down important things on a separate file. I recommend using excel or google sheets to keep track of thingsK... try to improve the world background a little and give some more physycal description of your characters. Pls be consistent with the information given
I is good but need a little bit to get perfectIt's a great story but it's a bit hard to get at first but all I needed to do was going through it two times and then I got what it was about
Trust me when I say this novel is unique, it is one of a kind and I bet you have never read a novel like this before. I have just read chapter 4 but I was already hooked by the engaging plot. Everything about this is original, you won't see anything cliche here.The characters you see here are not just some copy pasted characters you see from similar novels. You might suspect that the novels are made by one person and that they are simply writing about a parallel universe, but no, this is original. And that's why I have rated this novel as high as 6.2
This novel is really good for a wish fulfillment. I applaud the author and appreciate his great work. Author please make many girls fall in love with our MC but make it detailed. All the beautiful girls should be pure and untainted, just for vanity’s sake. Loli, mature, and ****. Just like Yun Che in ATG. Thank you. Policewoman, soldier and any type of woman make them all.
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