love it bro, it has potential,👍🏾......................................................................................................................................................................................................................
Well...I don't know what to say other than this story is a grammatical nightmare. It's just...sigh. The premise is beautiful and I guess you can ignore the errors if you like it enough but...well. You really should work on your pronouns in particular. Just to clarify, for a woman is used /she/ and for a male /he/. Always. No exchange between the two can occour. Not only that, you also fill the chapters with unneeded info, throwing up facts left and right, making it a boring read. Is the reason why I only gave you 3 stars for world background. It's not that you did not develop it, it's just that...you didn't really fit it very well in the story. You should try to integrate your info more with the flow of the story, revealing smaller bits in more points. There is no need to dump everything on the readers at once, it only stops the flow and few people will read those added parts anyway (like i did) which is a pity.Aside from those points it's a beautiful story, I liked it. You probably should just think more about editing your chapters rather than postin them quicker, really.Anyway, I hope I didn't offend you with my comments and that instead they could be of some help to improve your writing style.
Good read, the first chapter was good and the author did a good job with the introduction, I love a story when it is about war, it kinda gives you many ideas about an epic scene. Overall, not a bad novel. Great job!
This story has a mc that doesn't link to being a goblin, there is no real background created, the writing is quite bad, just the addition of a better translator could make the story more enjoyable, the story has been rather haphazardly put together and I can't say if it's the world or the characters, but it just isn't good enough.On the positive side, there is a non-human mc which is quite different and interesting. So I would recommend this if the writing get corrected alot, but not at the moment.👌
"Well that is because although your Jonin you either have the freedom to join me or are Jonin without much authority. If you want specifics, Kurenai I want you because your a Genjutsu master and that is the area I'm lack in terms of training. Gai you because of your Physical training and Taijutsu mastery. Yamato because I'm planning on befriending the Kyuubi and well would need you to make sure he's controlled. Asuma, your a very powerful fire user and have a good amount of skill in all areas and finally Kakashi for basically the same reason."
"Thank you Third Brother. Plant type monsters were already the weakest among the monsters, and this thorny flower is the weakest of the weak. It will be difficult to train it into a level 4 [Overlord Thorny Flower]. It's best if we leave it at that. You should focus more on training your own Guardian Spirit Beast, because that would suit your training the most…What? You couldn't summon your Guardian Spirit Beast? Ahh… Maybe you are just like me, the oddballs amongst summoners…What a pity. If only Third Brother has the talent to summon other monsters like you have summoned the thorny flower, then your future will be limitless. Such a pity…" When Lin Bing heard about Lin Yang's inability to summon his Guardian Spirit Beast, she was greatly saddened for him.
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