Always a fun read with great characters, interesting storylines with twists & unexpected turns. Nice sequel to The Ugly One. Love that little world. ..................
Didn’t you also write the book Lily Hates Me? Where can I read it at? I saw it on a different app but I don’t make purchases on there. I have read several books of yours and they are awesome. Great job!
In the early chapters, you will go insane. Chapters spent upon some random, evil guy named "Younger" (TL means youngster, but Qidian hires terrible translators). This guy just kills who he wants, takes secret techniques and obviously wants MCs eternal eyes, which should be extinct in this world. The author never even explains how in the f this random guy knows about the eternal eyes. It's as if anyone just knows from one glance at MC.Apparently, he was following a black bear to watch it slaughter some villagers. Our MC was 3 at the time and managed to activate his OP eyes, killing a huge black evil bear before it could harm his pregnant older sister. The evil dude "Younger" then disappears, kills some random elder from the Black Dragon Triad sect, steals his Yin and Yang Heavenly Sword technique and manages to get a pet evil wolf with a slim trace of ancient bloodline. Seriously? Why in the fook should we even care about a random evil guy? So much attention is given to a nobody for so many damn chapters. Then the elder's soul survives, tries to take over MC's body, MC of course wins, and also gets a copy of the Yin and Yang Heavenly Sword technique. Just b.s after b.s lol in this little backwater mountain village, all of this is happening.You will be frustrated so many times, because you can care less about so many of these things that the author shouldn't even mention.
A virtual reality novel like this is nicely written, as the characters is quite lively, bringing life to this book. And I think with a little more polishing, this can become quite popular !Here are some issues I want to point out however:1. Grammar: Among some of the grammatical errors were misplaced commas, which created run-on sentences; incorrect verb tenses, which should be past tense due to the way you write most of the verbs, and a few misspellings. Additionally, while correct, I found some sections of the sentence to be redundant ( example from chapter 2– “His friend’s reaction was so strange that he even thought about taking him to a detoxification clinic for help because that reaction was too abnormal.” [ ‘so strange’ & ‘too abnormal’ mean the same thing in this sentence, resulting in redundancy. So I would recommend taking out one or the other ] )Reason why I am saying this is because readers should have a good, first impression of your book. Hopefully my comments may assist you in your journey !2. Info dump: While I personally don’t mind, I do appreciate when writers can spread out information evenly in the chapter without massive info being placed out in front of me. It makes it easier to digest. While info about the game is perfectly fine, I believe the part about the quartet’s appearances could be segmented to when they appear in the story, so that I don’t have to go back to imagine how they look like.Overall, I think this has potential, but it only depends on you, Author.So keep up the good work !
To be honest I almost dropped this in the beginning as the grammar was quite grating but I kept reading which I am now glad for as the story got better and after getting some editing help I could enjoy the story much more. Light hearted feel good story with dashes of action and intrigue. Stay up all night reading it all in one go ☺ definitely recommend a read!
where the **** are the chapters? where the **** are the chapters? where the **** are the chapters? where the **** are the chapters? where the **** are the chapters?
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